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chiwardboard ranks Chicago’s 50 wards by how fast the city closes 311 service requests filed in them - towing an abandoned car, filling a pothole, baiting an alley. The records are public. The comparison, somehow, was not. Now it is.

We take the record seriously as data and refuse to take its language seriously. “Aggressive rodent mitigation response protocol” is not a sentence a neighbor says; “rat complaint” is. The official term is always one hover away, so anyone can check our work against the source.

The joke, where there is one, is the process - never the people in it. A ward superintendent should be able to send this page to a colleague.

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Corrections, ideas, and complaints about our complaint rankings: after.hours.builder@gmail.com. Answered after hours, which is when Chicago fills out forms anyway.

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